Strong Words Spoken Slurredly

While looking for a definition of "Nippy Sweety" as used to describe a lovely woman who could surprise you with her tartness (that's tartness, not tartiness or tartarness) just as a boiled sweet can make your mouth pucker, I came across this page of Scottish words from the BBC:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/alabaster/A139033

It doesn't have clabber, or even stoor, but I liked it anyway.

Got those predestination giant ape numb buttock blues

Went to see King Kong last night, and it was three hours long and bad. Well, that's a trifle unfair, but not as unfair as keeping me there for three hours.

First of all, if I want to see a chick-flick (not an uncommon occurrence) then I prefer to be warned in advance. I can switch mental gears, and start expecting lingering glances instead of explosions. A lot of this film is about a gurl meeting an unsuitable, violent guy and even though she, like, changes him with her love he still can't get away from his old life, and she has to choose between him and this sensitive artist type, who's much better for her, but nowhere near as sexy and dangerous. We've all seen this before, and it's no surprise when she ends up with the sensitive guy after the dangerous one gets killed by the cops (although, granted, it's unusual for her to be snogging the one before the other's body hits the ground).

Second of all, this is a remake, so there are no suprises. OK, I knew that going in, but even so, it's a long way to the top of the Empire State when your heart just doesn't care. And I didn't care. I didn't care about the Fay Wray stand in, I didn't care about the sensitive writer, I didn't even care about Jack Black's excellent Orson Welles impersonation. And I espescially didn't care about Gollum in a monkey suit. "Die, already" I kept thinking during the hour or so he spends on top of the aforementioned skyscraper, "Die and let us go home." To be fair, this may have had something to do with the Central Park ice-skating Bambi homage, where I just wanted to hide under my seat with embarrasment, and after which, frankly, death was too good for the big palooka. But I hadn't expected to be cheering on the guys in the bi-planes.

"Mr. Wagner has beautiful moments but bad quarters of an hour."
- Gioacchino Rossini (1792-1868)

Yes, there are plenty of good moments - the dino slugfest on Skull Island. The authentic 30's New York. Some nice jokes - the writer in a cage, Jack Black's Welle's pastiche, and the whole thing looks wonderful. 30 minutes in I was praying that someone has put Miller's "The Dark Knight Returns" in Jackson's hands - he would be superb to direct the ultimate Batman v. Superman epic. But, on the whole, a disapointment. If you can't engage with the characters, you can't engage with the story, and there was nothing here to hang my emotions on. Now if only she had ditched the writer off the roof and loped off into the "beayootiful" sunset with the ape...

Acronymia

I've been meaning to post this description of someone who's good looking until you see their face since I heard it for the first time on University Challenge, of all places:

BFB,FFC

Which stands, apparently, for:

Body From Baywatch, Face From Crimewatch.

Five Songs to Play At My Funereal (stolen from Morgaine)

I only had one in mind:

Take It With Me When I Go, by Tom Waits,

but,

Knocking on Heaven's Door, the Warren Zevon cover from his final album, when he was dying and he knew it,

Peace At Last, by The Blue Nile,

The Wild Moutain Thyme, by the Silencers

and

Sally Maclennane by The Pogues.

My epitaph, of course, will be: "Jesus, is that the time?"